Adventures in Dating

Anytime you go on a date or accept one for that matter, it can be an adventure.  After all, you just never know what may happen.  You may go out on a date with someone that you’ve been “dating” for a period of time, or it may be a “first date”, and you don’t know the other person at all.  Either way, adventure awaits you.  Having a good sense of humor helps tremendously.  Well, that and being able to roll with the punches that life throws at you.

For example, I went bowling with a date one time.  As I went to release the ball, my thumb stuck in the hole and I ended up following the ball halfway down the lane (on my belly, of course).  As my date scrambled over to see if I was hurt, I sat up and was literally shaking with laughter.  He started to laugh also, because let’s face it, it was pretty damn funny, so I challenged him to see if he could knock down as many pins as I had with the same move.  He declined, saying that he didn’t think he had “my flare and grace.”  Chicken!

Another adventure in dating was the time a date had taken me out for my birthday.  We ended up at a bar where he proceeded to get drunk and pick a fight with some other guy.  When this guy threw a punch at my date, my date ducked but unfortunately, I didn’t.  Yep, I guess you could say I “rolled with the punch” literally on that one!  The date itself sucked, but so many other guys at the bar were nice and protective towards me that it made up for the idiot I was with.  They made me laugh while the police and bouncers were breaking up the brawl.

Then there was the time I was working as a bartender.  The guy I had just started to date came in to see me and his entire family showed up. Now I had only seen this guy about 3 times and all of a sudden there are 20 people in my bar to check out who their “boy” is interested in.  Talk about being put on the spot.  He was mortified, but I just laughed it off.  I figured that if we continued to date, I would end up  meeting his family eventually, so at least this way, it was over with at once.  For me, the mortification came a little later when I inserted my foot in my mouth.   We were all joking around and having a great time and the guy I was dating (who happened to be sitting next to his mother), choked on something someone said.  Me, being the wiseass I am, snapped off the typical one liner that I would use around most of my friends.  “SWALLOW, DON’T SPIT, BABE!” with a  wink.   All eyes turned to me, and my date’s almost bugged out of his head.  AWW SHIT!  MOM!  She looked at me, and I looked at her and I shrugged. What could I do? I just rolled with it.  I told her he loved it when I talked dirty to him, and asked if she wanted a refill.  She fell out laughing, and told me I was breath of fresh air because I kept it real.  I think she was more impressed with the fact that I didn’t get flustered by a slip of the tongue.

Life is an adventure and so is dating.  Getting the most enjoyment out of it is what really matter, IMO.  Not everything will go perfectly, but if you have a good sense of humor and a positive attitude, you can still manage to make the most of any situation.

I have a date tonight.  I don’t know what will happen, but I do know that it will be an ADVENTURE!  Wish me luck!


This blog was written by me previously and is added here for content.

I Will Not Settle

At least once a week, I see a post about “settling” for a person or hear from someone that I need to just pick a guy and “settle” down.  Why is it people feel the need to “settle” or push others to do the same?

Parents, well-meaning friends, and even some co-workers will try to encourage single people to “settle” down.  Why the push?  Is it that they are so blissfully happy in a relationship that they just want to others to experience the same?  Could it possibly be that they are secretly jealous that single people have the freedom that they may long for and that they themselves “settled” for something other than their ideal match? I’m sure that the parents and well-meaning friends just want the people in their lives to find love.  What they need to realize is, is that encouraging someone to “settle” may not be the best advice.

Some single people are perfectly happy to be single and dating.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with that.  The idea that everyone needs to be coupled up like animals about to board Noah’s Ark is asinine.  They may not be at a point in their lives where they are ready or willing to commit to another person.  Some people may be at a stage in their lives where they are just looking to enjoy the moment, while others may be biding their time until the perfect match crosses their path. Life is a journey.  The path we choose twists and turns along the way.  Some people are content to travel that path alone throughout their lives, while others travel solitary for a while until the meet a companion that makes the journey even more enjoyable.

To me, “settling” means accepting something or someone less worthy than what you deserve.  For me, that is not an option. I consider it a negative.  It means that the relationship stagnates and does not grow, which is not a good thing in my book.  Any relationship that you choose to be in should be one that continues to grow, mature and develop through time. It should consist of two people that are not only on the same path in life, but willing to run headlong down that path, eager to find the next adventure together.

I would much rather be single and happy, than “settle” for any relationship that is a poor imitation of the real thing.  I am quite happy to date for now.  Should the right person come along, I would willingly jump into the relationship with both feet.  I am willing to wait for the person that is ready and willing to share all that life has to offer and looks forward to growing and exploring the path ahead with me, side by side.  I am looking for someone who is eager to see what is around the next corner, not someone willing to sit on the sidelines while life passes them by.

I do know this… I will not “settle” for anything less.

This was previously posted in another forum and added here for content.

The Letter…

I decided to do some spring cleaning and finally go through some of the old papers I had accumulated.  I have to confess, this is long past due.  I also tend to keep cards, letters and old movie stubs.  Why?  I guess I am just sentimental.  If I was a more organized person, I would put them in a scrapbook so they would at least be in some semblance of order.  As it is, every now and then I come across something from long ago, usually during a yearly purge session that brings a smile to my face.  It’s kind of like Christmas or going on an Easter Egg Hunt.  There is just an unexpected gift that makes my day.

The other day, while doing this purge, I came across an old love letter from a previous flame.  The letter that he wrote was written when our relationship was new and we were both unsure of what the future held, and if we should even proceed with a relationship.  In this letter he said some things that were very meaningful, that I’d like to share with you.

“I know we have the chance to have something special together.  I no longer question that.  In order to reach that, however, there is some risk involved and in this case, the risk is huge.  The more you are willing to risk, the bigger the reward will be.”

He was right.  What we had was special, and the risk was huge.  I risked my heart getting broke if it didn’t work out, as did he.  The relationship changed dramatically over the years, and my heart took a beating.  It may not have broken, but it did get battered and bruised.  Would I do it again?  Absolutely!  While the relationship didn’t work out, I have some great memories and learned some things both about life and myself.  But if I had never taken the risk of giving the relationship a chance to grow, I would have missed out on those five years.

There were some other things in that letter, but I’m afraid they will remain private.  😉   I should probably throw out the letter, but I won’t.  When I sat there on that rainy day, and re-read what my old flame had written it made me smile, and reminded me of days filled with laughter and nights of love.  In re-reading that old letter, I was able to look past the nasty breakup we had and instead remember why we had fallen in love to begin with.  By this I mean when I think of this person now, I won’t think of the final time we had contact, the bitter words we spoke, or think of this person with anger over how things ended.  Instead I’ll remember his words from this letter, and genuinely be able to look back on the relationship and remember the good times too.  In re-reading that old letter, it did remind me that we had some truly awesome times.  There are some memories that I will always treasure from my time with him.

Some may say it’s better to just throw out all things from the past but I don’t agree.  I’m not saying you should live in the past, but to revisit it once in a while, and reflect upon it isn’t necessarily a bad thing.  As a matter of fact, I think it’s pretty healthy.  You can learn a lot from the past.   This old letter made me smile on a rainy day and once again reminded me that you have to be willing to risk you heart to get that great reward of love.



This blog was written previously and added for content.


Nothing ever stays the same.  The only thing that is guaranteed in life is that things will change, usually when you least expect it.  This isn’t necessarily a bad thing.  Change forces us to grow, move with the times, and accept new ideas.  It’s how we evolve as a species.

Some of the changes we encounter aren’t always pleasant.  The death of a loved one, the loss of a job, having to move to a different place can all upset us, to say the least.  How we handle these stressful times and persevere is what is most important.  It shows us what our limits are and teaches us how to reach for the unknown future.

Change cannot be stalled, ignored or dismissed.  It is inevitable.  How we deal with change is another story…

Unusual finds…

You never know what you will find when you go to yard sales.  It’s true what they say…”one man’s trash is another’s treasure.”  Sometimes you come across some truly unusual finds.  My girlfriends and I usually go to yard sales on average about once a month during the summer and fall.

Last fall, we came across, and actually ACQUIRED the most unusual item to date… a live goat. Yep, I said it, a GOAT.  More specifically, a baby pygmy goat named Mason.  It seemed the woman having the yard sale had gotten him as a gift and her neighbors turned her in for having a farm animal in a residential area.  She had to find poor little Mason a new home.  Luckily one of my girlfriends happens to own a farm.  It was fate!

We went home and started building the new goat pen that day.  We also decided that Mason would be lonely in the pen by himself, since he was used to living in the house with Michelle (his previous mama), so we decided to get him a playmate.  After a brief online search, we found Matilda, another baby pygmy goat who was only 2 months younger than Mason.  Since Mason was already neutered, we knew they would be fine together.

The past few months have been highly entertaining for us.  The goats are funny as hell to watch play and we have been educating ourselves with ways to enrich their lives.  We are now in the process of building them a larger enclosure, complete with teeter totters, logs, wire spools to climb on, and possibly a tree house.

Mason’s other Mom comes to visit and brings him goodies.  He still remembers her.  🙂  She is happy he has a good home and that he is close enough for her to see whenever she wants.  There are a few children that visit the farm weekly and we talked to them about showing the goats in the local 4H club.  They are excited at the prospect.

Mason wasn’t by any means “trash”, but definetly qualifies as the strangest and most unusual find we have yet to acquire.  Best of all, he was free.  Of course, if you add up what we’ve spent in fencing, food, vet bills, ect., he may actually be the most expensive find yet.  Totally worth it!!!!  Makes me wonder what we will find this year…

The Grass is always Greener on the other side of the fence… or is it?

How many times have you heard the cliché, “the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence”? It’s one of those quaint little clichés your parents spouted off to you as a child, right? And the premise behind this, of course, was that once you were on the opposite side of that fence you would feel differently or will have regrets about your decision.
When it comes to dating I think you’ve all experienced the “grass is always greener” phenomenon in one form or another. Either you were the horse that jumped the fence and went off searching for “greener pastures,” or the one left behind in the paddock while your mate ran free. At some point, the one who did the jumping took a look back and noticed how green that grass was inside the paddock and wanted to return because they had come to the conclusion that “the grass wasn’t greener on the other side of the fence.”
Now I know you all date different people for different reasons and the same can be said for why you may part ways with those same people. You may let some people “jump the fence” because of a difference of opinion or simply because you want different things in life. You may “jump” because, although you loved them, they weren’t ready to love you, at that time. There are too many “what ifs” to mention. Each of you can fill in your own reasons for the “jump to the other side of the fence.”
So here is my question for you all to ponder; just so you know, there is no right or wrong answer. For every person the answer will differ depending on the persons involved and the circumstances. What is right for one, may not be right for another.

If that horse came back tomorrow, and was sniffing around your paddock, what would you do?

The way I see it there are a few options and I’ll list them for you. Would you…

A) Open the gate and let them in, but leave the gate open, so they could roam free (in essence, running the risk of becoming one of a harem).
B) Open the gate and let them in, but quickly close it shut behind them, because you don’t ever want to run the risk of losing them again.
C) Leave the gate firmly shut, since the past is best left in the past, never to be revisited.
Some people can learn that “the grass isn’t greener on the other side of the fence.” It’s all a matter of personal choice as to whether or not you would ever let that horse back into your paddock. So, I’ll ask again, what would you do?

This is an older blog that I previously posted for another site. I am adding it for content.

Murphy is a Bastard…

I want to tell you a little story about Murphy. You see, Karma might be a bitch, but Murphy is a downright bastard. He comes along and tries to mess up all the best laid plans of mice and men (women too!) This is the story about how I beat Murphy at his little game and will continue to do so at every opportunity.

I had a date with a man that I had been seeing for a few weeks. The man in question was a total dream. Tall, dark, Italian, and sexy as sin. My goal for the day was to spend the day with him, getting to know him better, and for him to get to know more about me. That’s it.

It turned out to be the BEST date in my dating history. It was also the WORST. Now you may want to know how a date can be both the BEST and WORST at the same time? Well, I will tell you. Murphy showed up and brought his Law with him, but I brought my attitude! I was not gonna let that little punk get the best of me.

The day started with my date picking me up for a fun filled day on his boat. We were going to spend the day on the river, tubing and swimming. The weather forecast was for a sunny , 90 degree weather. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky. It was perfect! I donned my bikini, packed us both a lunch, and off we went. We got in the boat and started down the river, enjoying the sights. There were sailboats and cruise ships and we had quite a few discussions along the way. Apparently, he was enjoying the sights along the way too, one of which was my cleavage. While he was perusing my assets, he failed to notice a tug boat pass. Now I don’t know if any of you realize this, but tug boats create a fairly good size wake. He didn’t notice that either.
Here we were, going along at a fairly good clip and then he realizes that we are about the hit the wake. HOLY SHIT! I have two seconds to grab on before the boat is airborne! I’m holding on with one arm, looking like Tinkerbell, flying! Then it’s back to reality and damn, what a hit! We bounced about 3 times and he quickly motored back. In the meantime, the bumpy landing caused me to hit my arm on the steering column, and my hip on the side of the boat. By time he got the boat under control and to a halt, I was on the deck, holding my arm, because I seriously thought it was broke, and trying to catch my breath. We both looked at each other and he asked if I was ok. What did I say to him? “Dude, if you didn’t want another date, all you had to do was say so! You didn’t need to try to make fish bait out of me! Jeez!” He laughed, helped me up and got ice for my arm and hip. “You’ll do,” he said.

The day progressed and we were having such fun. We laughed and flirted and headed for a little cove to anchor and swim. Silly us, we were so wrapped up with all the flirting that we didn’t even notice the clouds approaching until it started raining. Now, I’m not talking a little shower here, people. I’m talking deluge. The great monsoon! One minute I’m standing there, looking oh so cute, in my little bikini with my hair all done, and the next, I look like a drowned rat! Murphy has conspired against me! He took one look at me and struggled not to smirk. So what was I to do? I was freezing! It was pouring rain and I was cold. I jumped in the river. WTF! I was already wet, right? And since the boat didn’t have a canopy, there was no shelter to be found ON the boat, I figured the next best place was UNDER it, more specifically the bow. Besides, the water in the river was considerably warmer than that which was falling from the sky.

We played in the river, in the rain and he told me that couldn’t believe that I wasn’t freaking out about my hair getting messed up from the rain and the day being ruined. I told him that in all honesty, if we were going to be swimming, my hair would have gotten wet at some point, so why get bent about it.

We ate our lunch on the deck of the boat under a tarp. Not exactly the most romantic of settings, but then again, it kind of was. After all, it was just he and I, in our own little world. He mentioned the other incident with the tug boat. After all, the day had not exactly gone according to plan. Nope, it sure hadn’t. But in a way, it had, because I had planned to spend the day him. I accomplished my goal.

I had a great relationship with this man for a number of years. He later told me that if I had thrown a hissy fit over the little things, such as my hair getting messed up, he would never have gone out with me again, because he wanted a real woman who could handle life’s ups and downs. The fact that I could laugh at the situation and myself endeared me to him. It also gave us both great memories that I will always treasure.

The moral of the story is that you can plan who you want to be with, but not what life will throw at you on any given day. Sometimes you just need to be able to roll with the punches. If you sweat the small stuff, you may just let a great person pass you by.

Murphy might try to throw a monkey wrench into your plans, but he only wins if you let him.

I wrote this post a few years ago for another forum.  I am adding it here for content.

Life with a Rat Terrier

Life with a Rat Terrier has its’ moments. My girlies have made me laugh, cry and cuss. On a good day, they are pure entertainment and love. On one of their evil days, they can try the patience of a Saint.

Today was a good day. The girlies played with each other and Abby “spoke” to me with her ball in her mouth, telling me in her own special way, she wanted to play catch. When I ignored her, she dropped the ball and chased her tail or hind leg, running in a circle until she was so dizzy she couldn’t stand. Bonnie just wanted to cuddle. She is my snuggle buddy. I must admit, it was kind of hard to set up the blog site with a pooch in my lap, but I got it done. It took a little longer, but I didn’t mind.

Last week, the girlies were heathens. Abby ate the shirt off Dad’s back (literally), and chewed my sheets. So far, she’s chewed 4 sets of sheets, 2 comforters, 3 blankets, ate holes in 2 pairs of jeans (while Dad was still in them, mind you), and 2 shirts of Dad’s. It wouldn’t be so bad, except everything she eats is new. She has expensive taste. Bonnie just ate the carpet… You may be wondering how on earth a dog can eat clothing while someone is still wearing them. I wondered that myself. It seems that Dad likes to nap on the floor and have the girls run up and down his back. It was his version of a mini-massage. Apparently, the girlies tired of this game and Abbey found a new one of her own making. Dad just slept right through it. I’m convinced she chews my bedding out of spite. She can be a little bitch.

I wouldn’t give up my girlies for the world. They keep me company, like now, and bring joy to my life. They also cost me a damn fortune! All in all, I guess it’s a fair trade…


Welcome to Life is a Rat Race! I’m glad you took the opportunity to check out my blog site. I created this site as a means to post blogs written about my POV on life.
I suppose I should tell you a little about myself. I am single, female and a redhead. In other words, I’ve been known to have a temper. LOL I live on the East Coast in a Podunk little town with my two rat terriers (hence the name of the site). I am one of three children and the only girl born in two generations, so it’s safe to say I was a tad ruined by my grandfather. My rats, or the girlies, as I like to call them, are my babies. I date…sometimes not so successfully, but that is for the blogs. I tend to have a slightly sarcastic sense of humor and more often than not, I eat leather because my mouth works faster than my brain.
I hope you enjoy reading what is written here and welcome comments other POV’s besides my own. Sometimes, my blogs are written just to make people think. Other times, I write solely for my own enjoyment. Some people may recognize some blogs I will be re-posting that were written in the past by myself for another forum. These will be marked as such.
Take care… 